Myrt’s Blurts: Dos and Don’ts
Dos and Don’ts
Volume I: Cars
The list could go on and on, but for now, I’m keeping it to things I’ve seen in the last few months.
Personalized license plates: Don’t. I hope never to be in the same room with you, GASMAN 67.
Decals: Don’t. Putting two decals of naked women with their hair blowing in the wind on the back windows of your SAV (sexual assault vehicle): bad. Screwing on a Jesus Fish no more than 2 feet from them? Even worse.
Speaking of Jesus fish: Finding a Jesus fish magnet at the dollar store, putting it on your husband’s car as a joke, enjoying the month it takes for him to find it? Do. Definitely do.
Riding down the road on a motorcycle with a T-shirt that reads, “If you can read this, the bitch fell off:” Do. Hey, there comes a time when one should embrace the WT.
Bumper stickers: Don’t. But I must admit, I do get enjoyment out of a few. Seeing “I Love Porn” and “Jesus, protect me from your followers” on the same car made my day. Another classic: “We have enough youth; how about a fountain of smart?” And this one might get me into trouble, but I’m willing to risk it since it’s been two years since I first saw it, and I’m still laughing: