Inspiration

My other blog, Spanish Phrase of the Day, was inspired by my Cuban heritage. My grandparents emigrated from Cuba in the early 1960s and created a wonderful life here in the United States.

My grandmother passed away today at age 94. Her husband died in 1999, so it is nice to know that they are together again. I don’t usually get too personal on SPOTD, but I did write about her and wanted to link to it here.

Historical Blunders

A student teacher has to draw up an American history test for his tenth grade history students, focusing on post-World War II national events. He figures he will make it easy, seeing as how they’re just about to break for Memorial Day weekend.

Question #1: Name the intern who had inappropriate relations with President Bill Clinton in 1995.

This one stumps some of the students. What was that intern’s name?!!! One student writes, “Lebowski.” Student teacher laughs while he grades this test, but really enjoys the legendary response of “Martin Luther King, Jr.” What other conspiracy theories is this brilliant kid keeping from the United States? He certainly must know what goes down at Area 51.

Question #9: Name the hippie music festival that took place in the late 1960′s and early 1970′s.

Again, some kids are stumped. One girl in particular has no idea. She asks for help. Student Teacher says, “I’ll give you a clue. It starts with a ‘W’.” Girl rolls her eyes. “Okay, then an ‘o’ and another ‘o’, then a ‘d’. Girl’s eyes light up and she scribbles down, “Woodlog.” Student Teacher interjects and says, “Try again.” After thinking, she crosses out her first feeble attempt and confidently writes, “Woodshop.”

Woodshop vs. Woodstock (easily confusable!)

Heaven help our teachers.

*Thanks, CJ, for the story!*

Bloody Fantastic

Susan Boyle, the new hero of the “misunderestimated.” Go get ‘em, tiger.

Here’s the link since the video embedding’s been disabled.

Guest Post: The Wheels that Keep Our Country Turning

My office carpet produces an insane amount of static electricity. I failed Physical Science. Twice. So that may not be exactly what is happening. I remember a rod being rubbed against a rabbit fur? I guess in this example I’m the rod. But I’d rather be draped in rabbit fur. That’s beside the point though. There is tons of electricity in the office. Touch the filing cabinet. POW. Grab something off the printer. ZING. I don’t know why I’m surprised every time it happens. But I am.

Since realizing the potent force of electrons, or protons, or Jimmy Neutron, I’ve had one goal. To have an intern shock his mouth on the metal door handle to our office. Why? I have no idea. But I nearly got one to do it. We locked the door, double locked in fact using a lock on the ground, to ensure that the door wouldn’t fling open and deteeth him. He chickened out. But just by getting close, the two of us have been close since he left the office, nearly two years ago.

What else makes a strong intern? Killer guest posts for one. For another, being neither heard nor seen, yet managing to keep my outbox empty of clutter. Not calling me “Bud” in the hall is a major one. You should also keep your shoes on while at the copier. Where I work, summer interns are a special level of intern. During the school year, the truly devoted are interns. Once summer hits, everyone whose Dad or Mom is owed a favor gets in. You can spot these gems by their designer duds, high heels, couture bags, too much David Yurman, and Barack Obama pins.

While we’re fondly recalling intern memories (not fondling), here are a few more.

*Telling a managing partner at the firm picnic that he was a summer associate in his second year of law school, when in reality he was an intern in his sophomore year of college.

*An 18 year old getting totally hammered at an Orioles game, having his car impounded, and being forced to stay in a hotel near the stadium. It being a work night, he drove in the next day directly from Baltimore, neglecting his hygienic duties.

*An intern who in the matter of one week had her dorm catch fire, her car blocked in on the street, and a mono scare, all which prevent her from showing up to work on time.

It is wonderful to take part in guiding these brilliant young minds that are so full of hope and promise. We are fortunate to see these rising stars who look down on the entry level jobs in the office that none of them could even hope to get. Here’s to them.

Guest Post: My Out of Body Experience Or the Low Budget Parent Trap

JL and I were guests at a wonderful wedding this weekend. As a male, I dreaded the thought of attending said wedding. However, much good came of the event. Friday evening we were special guests at the rehearsal dinner hosted at Maggiano’s Little Italy. We mixed and mingled for about an hour before dinner and one guest, a man, caught my eye.

He was seated at the table diagonal ours so I could stare at him throughout the meal. Then, around the entree, it hit me. I didn’t know if I should say anything, at the risk of embarrassing myself. At first I thought of mentioning something to the guest next to me, as a sort of trial balloon. Instead, I swallowed my pride, leaned over to my wife and said, “That guy looks like he could be my brother.” Since she can’t/doesn’t want to hear anything I say, she responded, “He doesn’t look like Jon.” So I spelled it out, “He looks just like me. I haven’t been able to take my eyes off him all night.”

“You’re right,” she shouted. I was fascinated and totally freaked out.

JL raced over to his table and shared my thoughts with his entire table, he sort of agreed but was definitely uncomfortable.

Then, I turned to the side and it hit him too, just like Haley Mills, or Lindsay Lohan for you kids.

After dinner, we started to talk and things got weirder. We really hit it off. My twin is like 7 years younger than me, but he’s majoring in Economics and we talked about Financial Econ till the sun came up. Well, not quite, but we could have. Needless to say, a little more “me” was all the weekend needed. I had a great time, I swept myself off my feet. As we parted ways in the hotel Saturday night I said, “There goes one handsome guy.”

-ML

*Parent Trap photo from Amazon.com.

But Can You Annul the Memories?

British twins who were separated at birth met later on in life, felt “an inevitable attraction” and got married. After learning of their biological connection, they quickly got their marriage annulled.

So they probably looked quite similar, shared the same birthday and knew they were both adopted. Were none of these big enough red flags to prevent the union? If only they had checked it out beforehand!

Movie Review: National Treasure: Book of Secrets

JL was priviliged to catch a sneak peek of this epic film, while the rest of us had to pay full price to see it with the rest of America.  But no matter when you saw it, if you liked the FIRST National Treasure, it’s sequel will not dissapoint.

IRF gave you the scoop about the filming months ago, upon the very inception of this blog.  This was on the very day when JL wrote the check to become a “Friend of Mt. Vernon” and when I used my cell phone camera to scoop the Washington Post on this very important story.  I will tell you that the very cell phone photo IRF provided gives you a glimpse into a key (albeit not action-packed) part of the film.

 I enjoyed it, despite my usual apathy toward Nicholas Cage.  It was a tale of redemption, fighting for a family name.  It also achieved the impossible task of making history seem cool to young, impressionable minds.  No one, since Indiana Jones, has attempted such a feat.  National Treasure 1 and 2 will not have the same “staying power” as the Harrison Ford’s epic films, but it kept me entertained, and my nine year-old nephew went and saw it again the next day.

Sure, it was predictable, and not remarkably different from the first one, but I have to admit, when the movie left it open for a third in the series, I found myself getting excited, and wondering when it will come out.  Of course, this kid-at-heart already thought history was cool…

Three and a half stars.

 -Posted by LeMare

Guest Post: Huck, the Wannabe Kingmaker

A secret behind Huck’s rise is that it could have gone completely different. Imagine if you will, had Huckabee, as an ordained minister, come out and put people’s minds at ease about Mormon beliefs. What if instead of asking “Don’t they worship Satan?,” he had said, “Mormons do believe in Jesus, just like you and I.” The rumor is that Huckabee was floating this offer to the Romney campaign a few weeks ago.

Huckabee knows he can’t win the nomination, he’s too fiscally liberal for economic conservatives. But, he knows he has assets to offer as a Vice Presidential candidate. To Romney, he would put the Mormonism question to bed. Romney has had significant evangelical endorsements, but one from Huckabee would have united the conservative factions. On the other hand, Giuliani lacks the social conservative street cred because of his personal baggage. For him, Huckabee erases that concern. Basically, the minister could accept Giuliani’s confessions and absolve him in the eyes of the Religious Right.

Apparently, Huckabee either rescinded the offer, or was rejected by Romney. Which is why Huckabee has picked up on the track used by Ted Kennedy to defeat Romney in their Senate race. That is: toss out a lie about Romney’s faith, let the story run, offer an apology, let that story run, then repeat. Kennedy used staff and family to spread lies, just as McCain did early this year. As the media know, people read the lie, but don’t read the retraction. Since the race isn’t between just the two men, Huckabee can risk being seen as a bigot and turning voters off of himself and still benefit in the end by being picked as a running mate.

On a similar note, there is a YouTube clip of Lawrence Odonnell on the McLaughlin Group (one of my favorite shows) that I think is frighteningly telling about perceived Mormon beliefs. I can’t stand watching it. It makes me sick. It’s as if a cloud comes over his face. Still, it would be sad if we didn’t learn a few things from it. First, we should be resolved to be more tolerant of other people’s beliefs. We should certainly seek to understand other faiths. We should embrace truth wherever it is found and look for things to agree on rather than to divide ourselves. Secondly, we should speak up more about our own faiths. One of the rules of politics is that if nobody knows your opponent, you should define him for everybody in the worst possible light. What we don’t tell people will be replaced by what others like this guy say. Lastly, this rant is basically a look behind the curtain. We have a LONG way to go before people understand LDS faith and we are fighting VERY strong opinions. It may not be enough just to be “the nice neighbor.” So know your facts and don’t be shy.

Guest Post: Let IRF Do the Thinking for You

A liberal attitude was revealed the other day by none other than former President Bill Clinton. As you are hopefully very aware, his wife is running for president. This fact should keep you up nights. In fact, after you finish this you should go outside and warn your neighbors. During a visit to Keene State College Mr. Clinton, running for First Husband, said of the media’s coverage of the current presidential candidates: “One percent of the press coverage was devoted to their record in public life. No wonder people think experience is irrelevant. A lot of the people covering the race think it is (irrelevant)”.

What he’s really saying is “People don’t know what to think about, or what to think is important, unless we tell them.” People would have no idea where to find information about a candidate, or how to analyze that information independently. The way it works is you have the Clintons at the top of the authority ladder, they tell the press what is important, and the press tells you. Of course, if the press screws up, the Clintons will correct them and their vast right wing conspiracies. You wouldn’t know on your own that a candidate’s experience is an important factor. Nor might you think to ask what a given candidate would do if given the chance to hold the office. You might run into the voting booth and vote for someone who just today announced that letting the tax cuts of 2003 expire is not the equivalent of a tax increase. That same individual said that increasing the capital gains tax would only affect rich Americans, not realizing that half of American households own equities. You might also vote for someone who called for a “timeout” on trade expansion.

I don’t have to tell any IRF readers who that is. You’re all too smart. You know HER name.

The Rain in Spain

Have you ever had a class experience ruined by a disruptive classmate? The over-commenters, the know-it-alls, those that can’t enunciate their “t’s”? In my case, the culprit combines the first and third categories, rendering the last 12 hours of a certain professional training utterly trying.

After the teacher spells something out in the clearest of terms, this classmate says in a meandering tone, “You mean to tell me that [verbatim repeat of what teacher just said]?

Then, she causes the real grievance by bringing out the Henry Higgins in me. “Even d‘oh dey say it, dey don’t mean it? Dat’s why dey do dat?” With her commenting 30% of the time, this means I’ve been listening to this for 3.6 hours in the last week, not including breaks. What’s an English major to do?

Perhaps remind myself that at least the know-it-all has completed the program and isn’t coming back to class. This woman would ask an insanely long question based on her personal experience as an agent. She would then get an answer from the instructor and whip out, “Yah, I know, that’s what I tell them,” before the instructor was even done with the explanation. After a few sessions, a theme emerged from her client scenarios where she’d always end with, “Yah, I thought they were my friend.” Astute classmates could observe why “friends” became no longer when working with this person.

Posted by JL