Harriet Carter: Volume II (and other genius products)

May 21, 2007 at 9:07 pm 6 comments

Harriet Carter, purveyor of innovative products that women with multiple cats just adore, consistently delivers wares that surprise and delight. Who knew there were hot dog toasters and ear lifts available all within pages of each other? There must be a market for these things despite there not being a clear need for the products. Tonight we look at some of the latest offerings…

Now we know America has a weight problem when this product makes its way into the Harriet Carter catalog.

waist extender

The waist extender promises to add up to 5″ to your trusty Levis. After devouring a full buffet at swanky all-you-can-eat establishments, the extender could provide some sweet relief. The claim of “no more costly tailoring” sounds fairly honest (if you’re in need of constantly altering the waist on your jeans) as opposed to a $14,000 exercise machine that promises complete fitness with just four minutes a day of exercise. The makers of such a machine note front and center they have three big marketing problems and attempt to convince skeptics with their winning site WhyIsItSoExpensive.com.

Harriet Carter’s vision has caught fire in SkyMall Magazine–what better time to persuade bored passengers what is missing in their life than on a cross-country flight–and the evidence is plentiful.

tail-gating-in-style.jpg

Can’t you just see the MasterCard commercial? Trailer Hitch Stand and Two Chairs: $199.00. Six pack of beer: $8.00. Permanent loss of respect among passers-by in the parking lot: priceless.

plane-pillow.jpg

In response to the astute question posed here, the answer boils down again to respect, dignity and honor. While most of us aren’t able to answer this affirmatively, we can say that we have room to eat our pretzels, watch the in-flight movie and not be eyed suspiciously by the Federal Air Marshal.

baby-bumper-head.jpg

And finally, a product for all of the anxious mothers of toddlers out there. No more losing sleep about the bruises your baby is collecting on his forehead from knocking his head on the coffee table, the church pew or the book case. Rather than drug your little tot with Benadryl for that long flight, just have him wear this up until 36 months of age. When he gets fussy you’ll get nothing but sympathy from your fellow passengers, as they’ll immediately suppose he’s on a special path in life.

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Entry filed under: Harriet Carter, JL's Posts, Random, Travel.

IRF Weekly Wrap-up Helmet Head

6 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Lindsay  |  May 22, 2007 at 9:31 am

    A classic column!

    Reply
  • 2. Lowdogg  |  May 22, 2007 at 10:07 am

    Hilarious. The baby helmet is kind of unreal. I love when catalogues say “We found this item.”

    I kind of like the pickup chairs.

    Reply
  • 3. lemare  |  May 22, 2007 at 1:00 pm

    Not to leave QVC out of the fun:

    http://www.qvc.com/qic/qvcapp.aspx/app.detail/walk.yah.0012~7605

    Reply
  • 4. Helmet Head « In Rare Form  |  May 23, 2007 at 11:48 pm

    […] of alarm, I realized that the two previous posts have a disturbing similarity.  We have the Bumper Bonnet in JL’s Harriet Carter Post and then in Peruvian jungle,  Shigella-riddled LeMare in a zip-lining helmet just hours after […]

    Reply
  • 5. Jdon  |  May 25, 2007 at 2:40 pm

    Is it just me or does the fellow sleeping on the plane look like an airbag just saved his life?

    Reply
  • 6. IRF Weekly Wrap-up « In Rare Form  |  June 3, 2007 at 5:18 pm

    […] (This woman was clearly reaching out for a solution… Not sure if they found it at Harriet Carter.  IRF recommends sucking it up and buying Maternity […]

    Reply

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