Bad Summer Television

July 10, 2007 at 10:29 am 9 comments

The major networks are thumbing their noses at television viewers this summer and implying you’re a bored degenerate if you watch any of their programming. Case in point: NBC’s Age of Love, followed closely by the upcoming Singing Bee. Age of Love aims to showcase the desperation of Botoxed babes fighting for the affections of a verbally bumbling Australian tennis player. The only twist from ABC’s more polished Bachelor series is that half the women are in their 20s and the other half are 40 and up. The awkward moments caught on camera so far include:

Eager Bachelor Mark salivating on camera as he discusses being surrounded by a lot of hot twenty year-olds in the upcoming season. *Apparently nobody told him the premise of the entire show: does age matter…

Mark talking to the most attractive captain of the 40 year olds (who clocks in at 48) and discovering that she has a son just five years younger than himself. Kills much of the chemistry he is feeling.

A blond 20 year old pixie taking advantage of her one-on-one time to tell Mark she and her dog have the exact same personality.

When the 20 year olds move into the apartment with their older and wiser counterparts, one protests, “We’re not as stupid as we look.”

The extreme paranoia on the part of the 40 year olds about their age and “time running out.” After the 42 year old legal assistant got the boot last night, her last words were, “I don’t need to be reminded of my age or that I’ve been single my entire life.” What I thought was more sad was her profession at her age, but never mind.

Mark persuading his 23 year old favorite that while he has kissed every single woman he possibly could in the house, he hasn’t “kissed, kissed” them like he does her. And she buys it and goes in for another one.

The only thing the show teaches viewers is that desperation doesn’t have an age. You can be 21, 42, it doesn’t really matter. It would be more dignified to hold a seven-city concert series to find LeMare a Suitor than to ever submit to participating in such a show.

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Entry filed under: JL's Posts, Pop Culture, Television.

Miller Monday – A Blog for a Climate in Crisis! A Nice Slice of American Man Snack!

9 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Mike L  |  July 10, 2007 at 3:05 pm

    I like that Fox has already ripped off the Singing Bee with Don’t Forget the Lyrics. Really, was Singing Bee such a good idea that they had to steal it? Not that this is new, they did it to the Contender. But Singing Bee is such an awful idea and I take TV way too seriously.

    My recommendations: read a book. No seriously, check out Man vs. Wild.

    PS- LeMare is getting hit pretty hard in the last two posts. However, allow me to suggest 7 cities for the tour: Camden, New Jersey; Detroit, Michigan; St. Louis, Missouri; Orem, Utah; Richmond, Virginia; Atlanta, Georgia; New Orleans, Louisiana

    Reply
  • 2. Stephanie  |  July 10, 2007 at 3:34 pm

    LeMare can always come out to Dallas on her tour. There have been many marriages in the singles area here- I was one of them and so was my brother. Not to each other mind you. That would be sick and wrong.

    As for TV- my summer shows are So You Think You Can Dance, Psych, and Burn Notice.

    Reply
  • 3. lemare  |  July 10, 2007 at 5:19 pm

    i’m already salivating at the prospects for my tour… factory workers and coal miners!

    my summer show is traveler on abc. bummer i can’t see it here in japan.

    Reply
  • 4. Lindsay  |  July 10, 2007 at 8:28 pm

    Monk and Psych start Friday night, always followed by House. Does TV get better than that?

    Reply
  • 5. Jdon  |  July 11, 2007 at 3:41 pm

    Girl, you better not be dissin’ on LeMare Aid. You know you want to see it just as bad as I do!

    Reply
  • 6. JL  |  July 11, 2007 at 5:10 pm

    Naturally I’m rooting for LeMare Aid 2007. The music would be swinging, the concession stand food would be much better than usual, and what a grand moment it would be to see LeMare transcend upon the stage in a giant bubble (a la Glenda in Wicked) to greet her fine suitors at the close of the concert.

    Jdon, I suppose you’d be the snide judge who would get directly to the heart of whether these men have what it takes to woo and wed The Fonz.

    Reply
  • 7. lemare  |  July 11, 2007 at 6:54 pm

    The drinks would be pellegrino with lime, cranberry sodas, diet ginger ales, freshly squeezed lemon/limeade..

    there would be fine cheeses, delicious chocolates, gourmet cupcakes…

    I’d like to trancend the stage in a hot air balloon with fireworks behind me like on the count of monte cristo.

    Reply
  • 8. Jana  |  July 12, 2007 at 8:52 am

    May I recommend the band Milkshake for LeMare Aid? Fun for all ages.

    Reply
  • 9. jdon  |  July 12, 2007 at 5:42 pm

    JL,
    I’d vote for you as the official LeMare Aid “Man Snack” screener, so long as I get to screen all of the “artists” that will be performing. Speaking of which, I wonder if Menudo would consider a special reunion for the cause.

    Reply

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