Craigslist Gold-digger

October 10, 2007 at 12:36 pm 11 comments

To think the only post I’ve ever made on Craigslist was as pedestrian as selling couches.  A young 25 year old girl wants a man… and she wants him rich… and she wants him, apparently, without a prenupThanks to Critts for bringing this to our attention!

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I’m articulate and classy. I’m not from New York. I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don’t think I’m overreaching at all. Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 200 – 250. But that’s where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won’t get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she’s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level? Here are my questions specifically:– Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won’t hurt my feelings

-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I’m 25)?

– Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I’ve seen really ‘plain jane’ boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I’ve seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What’s the story
there?

– Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows – lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

– How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults – I’m putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I’m being up front about it. I wouldn’t be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn’t able to match them – in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.

*it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 432279810  
THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-431649184: 
 

I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.  Firstly, I’m not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here’s how I see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a
cr@ppy business deal. Here’s why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here’s the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity…in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won’t be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you’re 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold…hence the rub…marriage. It doesn’t make good business sense to “buy you” (which is what you’re asking) so I’d rather lease. In case you think I’m being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It’s as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as “articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful” as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn’t found you, if not only for a tryout. By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn’t need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you’re going about it the right way. Classic “pump and dump.”  I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.

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Entry filed under: LeMare's Posts, The Single Life. Tags: , , , .

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11 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Lindsay  |  October 10, 2007 at 1:19 pm

    Oh my.

    Reply
  • 2. JL  |  October 10, 2007 at 1:41 pm

    It’s nice that she clarifies she’s spectacularly beautiful.

    Reply
  • 3. Sportsattitude  |  October 10, 2007 at 2:20 pm

    Oh my.

    Reply
  • 4. Lowdogg  |  October 10, 2007 at 2:50 pm

    What a winner.

    Reply
  • 5. lemare  |  October 10, 2007 at 3:02 pm

    I love the part about “efficient markets”

    Reply
  • 6. Mikel  |  October 10, 2007 at 4:35 pm

    This is phenomenal. Although, Johnny Lingo teaches us that if you treat someone like a $500,000 girl, she’ll become one.

    Reply
  • 7. Mikel  |  October 10, 2007 at 4:38 pm

    Actually, this guy won’t bust into the million dollar range. He’s failed to realize that he could buy a put option on her. That would protect him in the event that she does fade as he expects. Assuming he can find a writer.

    Reply
  • 8. Kerry  |  October 11, 2007 at 8:35 pm

    Hey, maybe she should consider the leasing option… it’s a step up from renting if you can’t actually own!

    Reply
  • 9. Joey  |  October 12, 2007 at 12:22 am

    The post and response are so amoral. But, I’m with LeMare. All I can think about is efficient markets, and that gives me a warm feeling. So conflicted. So torn.

    Reply
  • 10. craigslist » Craigslist Gold-digger  |  October 15, 2007 at 9:46 pm

    […] the rest of this great post here […]

    Reply
  • 11. Kelsey Stadtmiller  |  November 5, 2007 at 11:11 am

    Gold Diggers are seen throughout our society. This blog is the cherry on top of the icecream. Gold diggers do not always admit that they are marrying a older man for his money, but usually it is blaintly obvious. The women above is a great example of this. She is trying to rationlize the fact that she wants to find an older man who makes a lot of money to marry. She tries to act like she is something special because she is admitting to this. She states that most girls are superficial when it comes to admitting that they married an old rich guy because they “loved” him. She is being just as superficial marrying an older rich man just for the sake of his money. The men’s response to her input are also outrageous. If a guy is telling you that he will make a large sum of money for a long perioud of time, but the woman’s beauty will not continue, this should be a hint for women. Why would you want to stoop this low? You obviously have a low self-esteem. Earn money for yourself, make a difference. Ladies, THIS CAN happen. It is not impossible.

    Reply

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