Guest Post: In Defense of HOA-Style Communism

October 27, 2008 at 8:50 pm 2 comments

In the summer of 2006 JL and I welcomed our first child into our home. Like most parents, we took our boy home from the hospital and thought, “What do we do?” Quickly we found out. We were swept up in a world of insanity. Many times during those first months I thought to myself, “Why do people ever have a second?” Somewhere in that process we received a letter from our homeowner’s association. Welcoming our first child into the world? Congratulating us? Offering neighborly aid? No, no, no. The note read: your grass is too long, your shrubs are unkempt, and the bush in your backyard is too tall. It stung. I read the notice on my front porch as I walked in from work. I felt watched. Not only that, I felt judged. And found wanting.

Today a real infraction has gone on in the old ‘hood. And I want the HOA flexing serious muscle. What could bring about this change in heart? Maybe it’s my tendency to demand leniency for my mistakes and swift justice for those of others.


Or, maybe it’s this.

And this.

Yep. There are five of them. And they’re hanging on 12 foot tall stakes. If you can’t quite make out the picture, those are bloody torsos. My grass never came close to being this offensive.

So, here’s to making all the houses look the same on the outside just like in the ol’ Bloc. Happy Halloween. As a guest poster, I’d also like to say that with only a few days until Halloween I am expecting another guide to trashy costumes.

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Entry filed under: A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words, Commentary. Tags: , .

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2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Adhis  |  October 28, 2008 at 1:32 pm

    I live in an HOA neighborhood.
    I hate HOAs.
    I hate bloody torsos more.

    Reply
  • 2. lowdogg  |  October 28, 2008 at 5:17 pm

    That is almost as disturbing as the West Hollywood Palin effegy.

    Reply

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